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Moving Alongside in a Round-A-Bout Way

Wednesday, January 26, 2011


Thank you for joining my in-process journey through Right Here, Right Now by Alan Hirsch and Lance Ford. Currently, I’m traveling through Alan’s “Briefing” chapter and stopping to engage each of his four suggested movements “needed on our behalf if we are indeed going to partake of the movement that Jesus started: move out (into missional engagement), move in (burrowing down into the culture), move alongside (engaging in genuine friendships and relational networks), and move from (challenging the dehumanizing and sinful aspects of our culture). (p. 35) Here, we looked into the move out (into missional engagement), and in the near future, Heidi Mashele will offer reflections from her own move in (burrowing down into the culture). Until then, I’m moving forward with the move alongside (engaging in genuine friendships and relational networks).

In an earlier post, I mentioned Alan’s challenging reorientation of the “Great Commission” text in Matthew 28:16-20. As we consider the move alongside, Hirsch describes his perspective by writing, “It is not simply about sharing the Good News with people through abstract concepts about Jesus and calling for a response—this is at best only part of the deal, at worst a shoddy witness and mere salesmanship. Friendships should be part of the equation. We are called to disciple the nations, which means we are committed to a long-term relationship with them that must surely include meaningful friendships, genuine involvement, and compassionate concern for a person’s best good.” (p.50) In other words, the “Great Commission” breathes, grows, and expands through discipling relationships that look “part cultural savvy, part organic friendship, and part hospitality.” (p. 51) With a descriptive and prophetic challenge, Hirsch summarizes, “Missional Christianity needs to get relationally savvy, and it should come naturally because we are called to love and discipleship.” (p. 52)


These comments read really well in a book about "Everyday Mission for Everyday People," but does anyone else out there feel like moving alongside through discipling relationships, in fact, comes very unnaturally? Here’s what I mean.

Recently, Bill Kinnon and David Fitch wrote helpful, succinct blog posts that seemed to thoughtfully deconstruct and (at least attempt to) reconstruct ecclesial leadership. In different ways, both posts point out what leadership has been while offering challenging possibilities for what leadership might become (or return to). Unbeknownst to either author (at least specifically), their reflections serve as stark challenges to the training, modeling, and leadership development I have experienced. Primarily, in terms of leadership, I’ve been molded to make organizational decisions, formally teach the Bible, and cast and protect vision.

While I accept the fact that decisions must be made, the Bible should be taught, and vision should be shared, modeled, and guarded, I’m not sure these components best support the scaffold of leadership.

If I don’t hold any inherent disagreement or disgust for these three expressions of leadership, what am I actually critiquing? Without articulating much in terms of new ideas (except stories from my own experiences), I am critiquing the way in which I have led in the past and sometimes find myself still doing today. Basically, my leadership attempts have originated out of a title and, additionally, the role represented by the title.

As a result, after many years of embracing and propagating this type of leadership, I have noticed a few of its harmful implications. First, when I’ve set myself up as the primary, role-based decision-maker, people (at least from my experiences) seem to take on a “just tell me what to do” posture. In other words, I (and usually a few close partners operating under similar leadership dynamics) do a majority of the thinking, wondering, wrestling, and deciding while most others seem to wait patiently to be told what to do. Although this assumes the guise of servanthood, I wonder if the posture creates unhealthy distinctions and distances among people. I don’t really have to give myself to others, because I’m not (deeply) involved in relationships as much as I’m doing what I’m told.

Second, leading from a title has given me too much of the wrong kind of power. I like attention, recognition, and others to look to me for answers (although I just critiqued it above...let me be honest, I've crafted and enhanced such dynamics, too), and I don’t need more help liking those things. For me, title leadership fed (and feeds) the ego…sometimes too much (as if a little is okay!), and I began thinking things like: “Look what I did,” “We’re such a great church,” and “You need to let me teach you a thing or two.”


I’ll never forget the Monday after we launched (language intended) our first Sunday worship service. 110 people showed up in the elementary school cafeteria, and that next day, I was on the phone with a close mentor exclaiming, “We did it! We planted a church!” I shudder to even recall, let alone share, the memory; however, it reveals the desires for power, recognition, and applause that were in my heart at the time (that surely have vacated by now…or not). Obviously, I’m still giving much of this over to the Lord (and these Right Here, Right Now reviews are helping); and therefore, I'm not laying my pride at the feet of title-oriented leadership alone; however, being “The Man” sure hasn’t helped.

Finally (there’s more, but…) leading from a title bred loneliness for me. Here’s a confusing reflection: if I’m going to be a good leader, I need to be a good follower, and when I was trying the hardest to be a good leader, I found (or took) very little time to be a good follower. Know what I’m sayin’? In the end, I was pretty sorry at both.

In our podcast conversation and in Right Here, Right Now, Alan awakens readers to a form of leadership that I’ve felt (and even experienced) for a long time, but wasn’t quite sure how to put into words: moral authority. When we walk with people, care for people, serve people, and sacrifice for people, it “comes naturally because we are called to love and discipleship.” (p. 52) Translated by me: a title doesn't necessarily result in leadership. Instead, leadership becomes an invitation offered by someone else...to move alongside, because of the struggles and successes of a shared and relational journey of discipleship.

Maybe I'm not the reader I pretend to be, but I've only re-read two books (that I can remember!): Following Jesus by NT Wright and In the Name of Jesus by Henri Nouwen. (Sorry Alan & Lance!) Although I'm certain that Following Jesus has much to contribute along the lines of this conversation, of the two books, In the Name of Jesus is the one I have in front of me tonight. While thumbing through it again, I was captivated and convicted by this gem: "Laying down your life means making your faith and doubt, hope and despair, joy and sadness, and courage and fear available to others as ways of getting in touch with the Lord of life." To the glory of God, may we move alongside whomever the Spirit draws into our laid-down lives with prayerful hope for another little Jesus.

*What about discipleship? Have such relationships come naturally for you? Share a story or two.

*If so, how do they originate? How do they take shape, grow, change, and twist as relationships normally do? If not?

*Where does Scripture reading and study, prayer, and your local community of Jesus fit into this conversation?

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